The Ford Report

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December 15th, 2011: Procedures

Everything found here was either directly observed by the staff, sent in by members of The Ford Report Mailing list, or quoted by anonymous Ford Report Minions. Keep in mind at all times… The Ford Report is for entertainment purposes only! Some of the things posted here may not be completely accurate. These posts may directly correlate to yourself, your team, or company. Use the link in this email to unsubscribe from The Ford Report if you find yourself offended by it. If you’re seeing it on the site, then feel free to click that little red ‘X’ and move on with your day .


  • First things first: Both my Dad and my Wife had their surgical procedures yesterday, and today both are home pleasantly surprised that they’re not hurting as bad as they’d feared. Out of respect for their privacy, I’m not going to discuss their procedures, but neither procedure put their lives at risk. Just made for a very rough day for their husband and son.
  • Spoke with the ever-ebullient and elegant Craig Miller today. It seems that he’s going to be returning to his old job at Procaps in the near future. Back under old management?
  • Meanwhile Valken has been busy behind the scenes looking to make LCP’s Galaxy Wars the event of the year for 2012…even though it’s happening in January!
  • Which reminds me…my wife, who’s commanding the “Dark Side” as Madam Director has made no bones about her being there and actively participating in the game on and off field. The timing of her surgery is such that she’ll be recovered by the time the event goes off, so no worries there. She doesn’t want to miss out on her re-match with Waverly!
  • Greg Hastings used his ninja like reflexes and speed to get past the Death Kitties and Bo to give me the info for this tidbit:
  • American Airlines is offering a discount for PSP players on tickets for their flights.
  • The NPPL sent out in their newsletter a special on the Pro Player’s pack of goodies, as well as announcing that NPPL On Demand will be available January 1 for the upcoming HB event.
  • Billy Smith of LCP strode in, put the fear of God into the Death Kitties and petted Bo the Happy Puppy and quietly passed this news on regarding Galaxy Wars: “Johnny P with KEE Action Sports has donated an Axe, bottle and Prophecy loader for the charity auction at LCP’s January game, Galaxy Wars, to raise money for Peyton, see for more info.”
  • E-Money let me know that Mike is selling a nearly new 2011 PSP Field for next to nothing. Email Mike at to get yourself a field on the cheap!
  • A-Bomb dropped me a line from SoCal: “Dale, this is Abomb from the SoCal Ghosts. I wanted to let you know the Velocity Paintball park in Ramona, CA (north of San Diego) is hosting their annual Santa VS Grinch game this Sat 12/17. The Ghosts have taken over this game to add our own special twist! Come help Santa save Christmas! More info at .”
  • That’s this weekend! Head on over!
  • Alex Reed kicked my door in to make sure I knew the truth:
  • Then the always lovely Suzy Barnett glided into the office to tell me about husband Tim’s passion:
  • Yeah, I thought it was going to be TMI as well….
  • RAP4 has rolled out their MKV.
  • Over in Taiwan, Machine Paintball’s Mike Spurlock is literally (according to Jimmy, anyhow) climbing the walls getting the first shipment of Vapors ready.
  • SLY has rolled out their 2012 lineup.
  • ProPaintball.Com reports on the Bob Gurnsey Scholarship for paintballers.
  • The PSP thinks you ought to rent a beach house for PSP Galveston…and have a deal for you if you do.
  • RAP4 is giving away 1000 palm lights on Christmas Day.
  • In case you missed the link in the “Items of Interest” email I send out every week, this past weekend I took a hard look at selected companies in the industry as part of my 2011 Year in Review. The utter lack of response from the industry people and the massive spike in my site’s traffic indicates to me that I was closer to the mark than I thought. to take an unflinching look at 2011.
  • I’m not an overtly religious person, and never have been. An encounter yesterday at the hospital while Ashley and I were waiting for her to go back to the OR does reaffirm what views I do have. I sat in the room with Ashley, watching her try to deal with the obvious pain that she was in, worried about my father 2400 miles away in Colorado having to deal with his issues surgically, and this little old man who was there waiting on his wife to come out of surgery walked in, asked if I was alright. I said I was, but apparently I wasn’t. This little old man took my hand, and he prayed for me to have the strength to tend to Ashley, and for her to make a speedy recovery. The sense of peace I got from this experience helped immensely. I don’t know your name brother, but thank you for what you did.

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